Sometimes I wonder whether heaven has given life to us out of mercy or in wrath. I've decided that I'm going to walk a portion of the Appalachian trail. I'm not sure if I'm going to do it by myself yet though. Part of me wants to do it, the other part of me really wants to go with someone else. I feel that I would gain more from the experience if I just head out by myself and try and survive. A true test of solitude. Me, alone, the galaxy above me and a hollow earth below me. A true test of courage.
I looked across my endless kingdom of sand that spanned across three provinces of earthly ruin while the sun spit hell upon me. I rolled my tongue around the inside of my mouth to try and clean some of the dirt from the crevices along my teeth. It was a wonderful day to die of starvation. A wonderful day to die of thirst. A wonderful day to find peace. A wonderful day to find life at my whits end. I knelt down, driving my knees and the tips of my toes deep into the dunes. I could feel it singing the hairs on my legs. Then I went to my hands and rolled my weight forward off of my knees so I could scoop up two large piles of desert earth and poured it onto my own head. Blame it on the sun, lack of water, or even solitude for what I did next but I looked down at the sand and said, " You are sand." The slight dry breeze blew past me rearranging the small gems of earth. It looked as if the ground had nodded at me, So i knew it understood. Then I pointed to the sky and shouted, "AND YOU ARE THE SUN!" Seeing as though it's so far away I felt that I needed to be louder so it could hear me. The sun shimmered slightly as to acknowledge me. I stood up, as tall as a man of 5 feet 4 inches could and I shouted, "And I am, I am life, and life is here now. I am here to keep the earth company in it's loneliest of moments. I am here to to acknowledge the power of the sun. I am here to sustain this earth so both of you have purpose. So in order to sustain me I will need water. " I sat and waited for an answer. The sun was caught deep in thought. He slept on the idea for days. He would rise slowly in the East and fall gently to the West. The sand swirled in the wind, it's mind plagued by the decision. I sat in solitude, not moving from the spot that I had sat down in originally. Then, for the first time in months, clouds moved in from the eastern horizon while the sun slept and it began to rain. It rained for four days without showing signs of stopping anytime soon. The sand was elated to be cooled by the warm drops of evaporated water that fell from the sky. The sun was dazzled by the colors that he could create if he shined at just the right angle through the clouds. I was just glad to be alive. On the fourth day, it stopped raining and from the earth rose the first plant in my new kingdom that spans across three provinces of earthly ruin that respects the power of the rising sun , that keeps the earth company when he seems to be alone, and that sustains life.
Somewhere along the line we thought ourselves above the nature of things. We have forgotten that all things are important to sustain life. We have lost our way.
Who will save us from ourselves. I am not religious, I have not accepted any organized religion as my crutch, nor do I claim that I have ever found religion or that I believe in an all powerful being. But I do have faith.
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