After last night, I don't think I ever want to drink. Alcoholism runs in my family and what I saw last night was the most atrocious thing I've ever bared witness too. I will not become that. Promises Kept.
I have no motivation to write anymore for some reason. I've been sitting here listening to American Nightmare on repeat and it feels like all the substance has been taken out of me. But I'll move through it.
You ever feel like you need to tell someone you like them but know that you shouldn't. Yea I'm that way today, and have been for a week now. I told myself a little over a year ago that I was going to take myself out of the whole relationship scene for a long while. This is what I get. Alone in New Jersey, the place I call home, four white walls and a window mark my life. It'd be nice to have her there with me sometimes. To sleep next to. One day maybe, not today. It feels like I'm still in high school with all this shy crush bullshit. But the situation as it is now makes it so it doesn't work out with a happy ending.
My days since my last post - lets analyze. Spent Sunday and Monday doing work for school so I could spend time with Kelsie and Heidi on Tuesday, so nothing special happened until Tuesday. Tuesday was awesome seeing them. I bought them Pizza because lets face it, pizza anywhere else sucks really hard. Then we visited the beach and Lighthouse. It was raining be we had fun anyway. Then we went to Rowan, visited Philly and had some Mexican food. Ultimately, I love seeing them. They make me happy to be alive. I miss them already, when they come back when it's warmer, it's going to be epic. We'll have a lot more fun. I wish I had more to say, but I'm boring.
No comments:
Post a Comment